I have recently recieved quite a few emails regarding the pressure young adults are placed under, as many from worried parents as young adults a like, do we really understand the pressure they are under and do they understand why we do it, maybe we don’t even realise what we are doing, with the way the world is today, as parents we look for the happiness of our children, but at what price,many young adults see that if it had not been for the view of their parents regarding their education and lifestyle, they would not be where they are today, this is wonderful , when the result is this, but, sadly our happiness wish has the reverse effect, in some cases and they carry this burden with them through their adult life, full of insecurities and never feeling worthy or quite good enough.It is never our intention to do this, but it is important that we see the pressure they are under.
We insist that they have perfect friends, perfect bodies,what they watch on TV,where they go and who with,do they have the right clothes and do they live in the right area,the right type of house and peer pressure, school can be a cruel place, children are cruel in many cases,but the pressure is really on in the later years of education, we want them to go to university, to get to university they have to pass a number of exams,lots of exams, from those exams they have to get the right grades, then they have the pressure of if the university will accept them, do they get the university they would like, do they eventually study what they would like, do they have the career that they want, where there passion truly is, or do they live the life we want them to have……… the pressure is on………during the exam period the stress levels are high, but are they truly recognised,it is very difficult for them to motivate themselves,hours and hours of revision and dedication,knowing that the next round the following year is going to be harder than the present one, do we really give them credit for this and acknowledge there stress levels. Your teenage years are supposed to be full of fun and days to be remembered, not years comptemplating your options, if you have any !!!
As these teenage people go into adult life, they should be happy and stress free, some will be, but others will carry this state of anxiety with them in every thing they do, every job interview they have and life changing decision they have to make will be a nightmare and the stress levels will go up and up, so maybe we can try to help them and them themselves, as parents we always want the best for them,we guide them as best we know how to,nobody gave parents a manual when they arrived, and nobody gave the children a manuel to be the best child ever…………………..so we have to give and take, we have to push when required and leave alone when the time is right, always be there when you are needed,love them in all circumstances and they must know that they are loved, no matter what the outcome of any situation……and as children if they do the best they can, nobody can ask for more.
Brooke Universal Life Coach