When there are continual arguments within a home, it will affect the harmony within the household and can bring about insupportable situations,even though there maybe family members who are perfectly level-headed and sensitive to most situations, holding a general respect for younger and older members,but when you find a strong impulsive dominant person the situation can be strained. I would suggest that when dealing with these kind of people is to take on an intelligent attitude and to become an expert in managing this situation , this way peace will return to the family unit much quicker, than fighting every inch of the way, this only prolongs the moment in time the situation and is better to defuse in a short period of time. Don’t feel you are always giving in to the dominant one.
It is far better to defuse, as a lack of harmony can provoke a bad state of health, and the dominant party will also start to place the blame on the other party for them feeling ill and not being able to cope, this is turn can then start that both parties start to suffer from depression, and they will start to feel very trapped within this situation with no way out. Remember that when you reach maturity with emotions, you will be able to avoid and to fall into the trap of this behaviour and you will be able to react and not be so impulsive in your reaction.
The key is within the serenity, if before a violent attitude and the wish to always be right, you will only see that both parties are reacting on the same level…If we are capable of marking a distance and not reacting in the same way, we are showing emotional maturity and will probably shock the other person, when they do not receive the reaction they maybe wished for.
A famous French Author VICTOR HUGO, said ” Who always insults me, will never offend me “
Four essential ways necessary to find a solution:-
Always remain calm, and avoid criticism , although the other party may insult you, shout or threaten you, you must remain calm for the situation to calm down
Move away from the conflicting situation, let the other person rant and rage, let them let the anger out, without confronting them…. when the other person realises that you are not going to argue and get into a conflict situation the other person will calm down.
Listen and do not judge, When the other person is within their aggressive attitude, watch and listen with interest without showing a reaction, show a little compassion and the other person will realise that they have lost control.
Reach an agreement, when they have finished their verbal attack, they will eventually feel more calm…….you can then discuss the problems on a more relaxed level, without raising any voices…. you can express how you would like things to be done and discuss the differences in the correct manner.
Brooke Universal Life Coach