Relationships change, but that is not always a bad thing, it really is inevitable, when we start the intense relationship with romantic passion we are sure it is going to last for ever. However we must be aware that things change and we must be prepared to confront this and allow the relationship to move forward.
Buddha once said :- The only constant thing in life is change
In stage one of our relationship it is usually full of romantic passion and everything is wonderful, on all counts, we must be sure that the compatibility is there in our life style, our values affection and sexuality. If we fall in love with someone we are not compatible with, we are almost guaranteed failure, there will never be enough sentiment for it to work, the trust and fear will surface between you and this will affect the relationship.
When one of the couple is insecure, they will tend to see negative points in the behaviour of the other, silly things like a late reply to a message or call, will have the other thinking negative thoughts, if you suffer from insecurity, seek professional help to help overcome this and enjoy your life and your relationship.
There are certain indicators that are partner is not into the relationship as much as the other, if they still see ex girlfriends for dinner or still do the rounds on the various web sites they were previously associated with, should this happen please check in with your dignity and have a good clear conversation regarding this, a person with dignity would never allow another person to behave like this and to cause them any emotional suffering and to take advantage of their good nature.
When you decide to live together, this usually can be a time of the emotional type of problems, when you start to live together there will be practical issues to overcome and both parties have to show willing to compromise and reach satisfactory agreements.
Living together also means time to negotiate, put forward all your ideas and petitions it’s a big change for both parties, this has to work both ways, don’t make the mistake of wanting everything your way, this is important to do at the beginning, other wise you will witness scenes of anger, tantrums and even resentment, this will create emotional distance between you, until there is nowhere to go, and the relationship can only end. Love and negociate are two very compatible words, you may not think it sounds very romantic, but it is more romantic than a bad end….you both have to know how to negociate all the aspects of your relationship, before it is a problem.
The finances associated with the home and the couple should be talked about and clearly known how they will be taken care of, this will avoid problems later on, many problems can arise with these points are not made clear from the start. Again it is important to reach an agreement that you are both happy with.
Living together also involves respecting the other and there habits, we all have them and the sooner you share them with your partner the better, this is all part of being compatible, also when you are used to your our space, it can be difficult at first to start to share that space, we all need our space and should value this for everyone concerned. You may need space to do a special hobby or activity, or you may find your space by being with friends, this is not a crime and should not be frowned upon by the other partner, one is not the property of the other, we do not own our partners. Love is not about that, love should be free, we should not try to influence our partner, that will work at the beginning but later resentment can set in, and time is not something we can recuperate, there is also an abundance of love in this world, enough love for everyone to have their share, and to be happy. Love while you can, it truly is a beautiful thing.