Do you realise how we program the lives of our children with the same frenetic style as our own, everything we do we do in a rush, obligations activities and the little time we do spend with our children, we just pass on the stress, it’s like contagious, the first thing we should do is slam that brake on and start to treat them like children with simple methods that we have at hand.
A thousand activities a thousand toys, our children inherit are excess of everything and we forget that they have a right to live a life as a child….It is so unfair that we impose that we are with them and into their life.
We should lead by example, our children are usually are reflection, so we need to start with ourselves, taking on how we are and are necessities, we should relax and park are feelings of guilt a way for a while, and start to see on a daily basis what is urgent and what is important, when you do this, you give yourself strength to remove excess things from our life, it is far better when we are in tune with are funny side, our sense of humour and laughter, resources we understand and love.
When we separate are adult world from that of a child………………It is not right or fair to weigh a child down with adult worries and it is of no good to them either, in fact it can damage a child in a big way, we should not speak to them about things they do not fully understand , they should not be involved with work or family problems, they cannot help to resolve these problems, so they should not be used to relieve you, and we should not pass on to them our fears or ambitions, it will wear them down and is totally unnecessary, they should not witness things they are not prepared for, they are not watching the news………….
Children understand how to enjoy life much more than we do, we really should allow it to be contagious.
Starting the day well………….to start a day well we need to get out of the routine of rushing from the pillow to the door, it is much better for children to go to bed earlier and to waken them with time, it is so important that children awake with and see smiles in the morning, if it is not possible to be there in the morning, make an effort and try to eat together once a day , give the day a little more balance, give them the opportunity to express themselves and any little day-to-day problems they may be facing.
Limit the activities………at times we want so much for them to be involved in things, it can turn around and bite you.. you try to occupy the children while you work, the best schools and a list of extra activities after school, however this should not be abused, two days a week is more than sufficient, it is better for them that they become a little bored than worn out with these activites.
The value of daily things….. this will teach us to value daily essential things and not only the material side of things, we also find it helpful to pass time with them and helps us into becoming better adults, happier adults, we have a lot to learn and them from us. It is said that a child smiles 300 times a day….a teenager 80 times a day and an adult between 10 and 20………..what does that tell you ! Parents and children can both learn to love life and to get the most out of it, both parties can win here, by doing things together that you both enjoy, knowing you have their attention and love and vice versa……a lot in life is free, and your and their life should be full of cuddles, kisses, smiles and love, never forget to tell each other “I love you”
As our children grow, we move away from happy feelings and more into looking for perfection, totally moved by tension and stress we spend more time correcting them than enjoying them. don’t spend all your time shouting or being angry with them, break the silence with a hug, a funny comment, transform that difficult moment into a moment of love. This is a great way to overcome stress with them, sometimes they just don’t understand you not being happy with them !
When you are happy it is beneficial to both parties, and also to the people around us, it can be contagious our attitude in our circle is very important, especially for our children, running around like headless chicken is not a good example to anyone.
Brooke Universal Life Coach